To Bridesmaid or not to Bridesmaid. That is the question.

Hi all!
Sorry, haven't been around much, still settling in to the new place. My computer seems to only be on when I have to do bookwork or payroll, these days.
I have an issue I am having a hard time with, and I'm looking for some insight. A good friend of mine is getting married in May, and she asked me yesterday to consider being a bridesmaid. She said "before you answer, I want to tell you that the dress is strapless." She knows me well....I'm not sure I would be comfortable in a strapless dress.  Number One, I'm going to be 49 next Monday.  Things are not as perky as they used to be, and WLS hasn't helped the situation. I've never had great arms, and the batwings are "battier". Both the other bridesmaids are 10-20 years younger than me. One is larger than I, the other is an itty-bitty thing.  I hope to have lost more weight by May (I am going to get a fill today in Minot which will hopefully kick my butt into gear) which won't help the batwings, either.  My friend has had WLS and she understands how things are, but she's 10 years younger and her skin has snapped back pretty well. That's why she's giving me the option of bridesmaid or host & hostess with my hubby.
The day is her day, and not about me, but I also want her to have a beautiful wedding and not have me falling out of my dress or flapping my "wings" all over the place. I am soooooo honored that she has asked me, and with any other dress with sleeves I'd jump at it. I just don't know if I can get past the discomfort I know I'll be feeling.  HELP!

Val

Hi Val...Long time since we heard from you. Have missed hearing from you.  Congratulations on your new house. 
About your dilemma of the bridesmaid offer.  That is a wonderful honor to be asked to participate in your friend's wedding.
I think it would be up to you and how comfortable you would feel wearing a strapless dress.  Would you be self concious and miserable throughout the whole affair?  Being a Hostess and having your husband Host with you is just as much an honor and perhaps something you would be more comfortable doing.  I have heard that you are very outgoing and gracious and this seems to be a good job for you. You want to enjoy the day and please your friend as well so follow your heart and be honest with yourself.  Either "job" is an honor to be asked to perform so go with your feelings and enjoy this wonderful event with your friend.
(by the way my Birthday is Nov. 15th.....and my Lap RNY is the 19th....my best birthday present ever.)

Hugs,

Sandy

Hi Val!! I know how you feel. My sister asked me to be her maid of honor and I was HUGE (still am, lol) I initially thought no way am I going to be in a tight satin dress next to skinny -minis!! But I did it because I knew it was more important to be there for her than to care what anyone (including myself) thought about howI looked. I still am horrified by looking at the photos but Im glad I did it. Just my experience.

Good luck with whatever you decide. Your wedding photo is gorgeous by the way!!

Hey Val,
Good to hear from you!

Bridesmaid or hostess....hmmmmm

Here is my take on it:

Bridesmaid- you will walk down the isle,stand with arms at your side, get some pictures taken, arms most likely at your side..go to the reception and put on a shawl or sweater when no picture line ups are around. That way your arms will be covered while reaching for this or that or dancing the night away etc...


Hostess- with the most-est! Make it a gala affair and enjoy the time for your friend. You and hubby make a striking pair and who wouldn't want to be greeted by you both!

Like I said this is just my opinion, take it for what you may

Kelly/tink

Just wondering what you decided?
Becky

She begged, and asked me to come to Bismarck and at least try on a dress. I did, convinced her I needed a shawl, too, and will be in the wedding in May!